I’m delighted to post the first in a series of guest posts on the site this evening. I don’t have experience of all aspects of anxiety or depression (which I’m glad about, by the way). With this in mind I’m keen to feature blog posts from other mental health bloggers, to give readers a wider understanding of the conditions. I also think it’s important to support others who are working hard to raise awareness as I know how difficult it can be to put yourself out there.
How I Learned to Live With Panic Attacks
A Guest Post by Hayley Beth
Hey! My name is Hayley and I write the blog LOVE HAYLEY BETH. I want to start off by saying a big thank you to GADDAD for giving me the opportunity to write this blog post today! I have been knowingly suffering from anxiety for two and a half years now. At first, I tried taking medication to ‘cure’ me but it soon became obvious that this was not the correct solution for me!
As soon as I discovered what was actually wrong with me it felt as though a weight had been lifted from off my shoulders but I also developed a crippling fear. I was scared of myself. Now my episodes had a name, panic attacks, I was starting to live a life in fear. Scared that at any moment I could start panicking. This, in turn, caused me to have panic attacks about having panic attacks.
I then tried forcing myself not to have a panic attack but that just caused them to be ten times worse. They would be bigger and even scarier. I remember one such panic attack was so bad from bottling it all up, I thought I was down by the railway waiting for a train to step out in front of when in reality I was curled up on the kitchen floor.
It was at that point I realised what I was doing wasn’t healthy. It was causing me to fear leaving the house just in case I had a panic attack. I was struggling at work due to this fear sat in the back of my mind.
It was at this point I realised that sometimes I just have to have a panic attack. Get all of that fear and emotion out of my system. By doing this I was able to learn the signals my body gives me, I am able to get to a safe place and allow myself to have the panic attack.
Since doing this I have found panic attacks happen far less and life has gotten a little easier. Of course, I still have days where leaving the house scares me shitless and I do still overthink every aspect of my life. But at least one part of my anxiety has eased up.
I want to help spread the message that anxiety and panic attacks are not our ruler, so I have created a line of sweatshirts to do this. be your inner wolf. The design is based on a tattoo I got done earlier this year to remind me that I am strong, that I can do it and it is also there to protect me when I am scared of myself. You can order a sweatshirt here! You won’t be charged until the campaign is a success.
I hope that by reading this post you have found help and reassurance that things do get better.